This next escape seems to hold a different kind of weight...
Like I'm changing the destination of the title Home
When I reflect deeper I notice that Canada never quite felt Home-like
It lacked a welcoming warmth, it lacked cultural value, it lacked real interest for individual thinking
I notice that this move is a push to escape the orbit around my family and their house in Canada
It's an invitation for them to change their patterns
To escape the routines of submission they have integrated so well
To dream bigger, better and out of the comfort of the well-known
This change is heavier than the goodbyes, farewells, see you laters..
It requires a shedding of skin
It asks me to forget the masks I'm so used to wearing here
The polite smiles under judging eyes
I accept that I don't know "better"
Not in the way of presumably knowing the future...
Or being able to compare
I know the feeling of freedom, the open road, the lack of a precise destination
I know the smell of adventure, fresh, exhilarating, curious
The sounds of joy too, the rhythmic exclamations between contentful silence
It's all quite different than what I see now...
So many people saying... Well what can we do anyway?
The silence is tense and doesn't last long... the air is filled with empty chatter
Threats about every human activity
Threats about your future income... your duties to the state
Some weak reassurence... Oh it will get this bad everywhere... there's no escaping it
Oh well... Maybe there is no real solution...
The demons will catch up you say... sure...
Well I can at least enjoy the run...
I can at least try to fly.
Out of this orbit