This article by Miles Mathis, first published on November 30, 2019, satirizes the London Bridge stabbing incident, questioning the coincidences and narrative surrounding it. The author highlights the names of the stabber, Usman Khan, and the Mayor of London, Sadiq Khan, along with Sadiq Khan’s constituency in Tooting. Mathis expresses disbelief that Usman Khan was controlled by a man wielding a narwhal tusk, a fire extinguisher, and a convicted murderer named James Ford, who was supposedly on day-release from a life sentence for the murder of Amanda Champion. The author notes the potential, albeit sarcastically dismissed, connections between James Ford and the Champion peerage and Ford peerage.

The article further questions Usman Khan’s presence at a Cambridge University conference on prison rehabilitation on London Bridge, especially given his prior terrorism conviction in 2012 for planning to bomb the London Stock Exchange. Mathis suggests that tourists should be warned about “street conferences for convicted murderers and terrorists.” He also points out the perceived lack of deportation or imprisonment for Usman Khan prior to the event and mentions a video of him discussing terrorism at age seventeen.

The author then focuses on Usman Khan’s first named victim, Jack Merritt of Cambridge University, questioning his identity and potential involvement with MI6 or the peerage, referencing his appearance and jewelry. Mathis dismisses any connection to the Merritt/Merrett peerage, including the Merretts of Pondhead Farm, their relatives, the Stewart Baronets, the Conyngham Earls, the Douglas, Marquesses of Queensbury, and former Prime Minister Gordon Brown. He also dismisses a potential link to Merritts in South Africa and their aristocratic connections. The author notes the absence of Jack Merritt’s mother’s name in reporting.

Mathis is critical of The Mirror’s reporting, particularly the use of quotes around “champion” in reference to Jack Merritt, suggesting it’s a veiled link to the Champion family. He questions the statement attributed to Jack Merritt’s father, David Merritt, advocating against draconian sentences, finding it implausible given the murder of his son. The author also questions why photos of Jack Merritt drinking wine and champagne are prominently featured, speculating about death-faking.

The article concludes by comparing photos of Usman Khan at different times, humorously commenting on his eyebrow growth. Mathis then draws a parallel to a previous London Bridge attack in 2017, involving knife-wielding individuals and fake suicide vests during a general election, noting the speed of the police response and the nationalities of the victims. Finally, he makes a jab at Boris Johnson’s appearance and compares him to Trump, suggesting their looks are part of a deliberate political performance.

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